ZOMBIE HORDE 3 6/10

WAUDGGLAKJSHDALDIUENULGEAIUG...sorry that was me vomiting so that my head would not explode from rage. That was my first response when I saw this posting. But I clicked on it any way cause I am in fact hardcore. However, a funny thing happened when I clicked on the link. The game did not load. I guess God finally put a stop to that shit before it could do real harm to humanity.
Then I tried later and the game is much better than the past ones. In fact it starts out ripping the games pretty hard… I guess they listened.

ZOMBIE HORDE 2 5/10

I know, I know I was thinking the same thing you were the masterminds behind the shit bomb decided to atone for their sins and fix all the problems that I pointed out in the first shit ride to nowhere. Well for starters they got rid of the cardboard box crap and now its just you in the woods. Mistake one is what well will call that. Like I said before 90% of the fun on this game was watching the “fort” get demolished while you chuck bricks left and right. But maybe they are trying to set it up a notice you make it hardcore.

After all you now have two weapons( you still have to reload), but that just translates into two scoops of lame with a side of moron.but it starts out like “hey you there we to see how hard core are about killing zombies so here is a test”yet again they introduce that bullshit about how killing zombies get you money which you then need to buy weapons. Here’s the problem (one of many)you also have to buy ammo. How hardcore is that? Not very. When I died it was surprise surprise quite lame. Note to those who keep churning these games out ….STOP. IF I DON’T STOP YOU GOD WILL.

http://games.arcadeinvader.com/2008/06/zombie-horde-2.html

Ultimate Duck hunting

Zombie Horde 5/10

WHAT THE FUCK?! That is really all i can say. In this game you protect you cardboard box of a fort from zombies by heralding bricks at them. Sounds awesome right? Exactly SOUNDS awesome. It looks about as cool as pac man eat crack cocaine(or whaterver the hell those dots are) while being chased by the KKK(or whatever the “ghosts” are supposed to be) this game gets old fast but there is o whole subplot of I don’t get a shit save some civilian. I had more fun watching the zombies, and birds for some reans, tear away at my cardboard box(which for some reason or another cought fire.

The most rewarding part of the game was when I was able to save up enough money(I guess it come from the zombie fairy, formaily the tooth fairy but shit got rough,) and I bought a shot gun that was fun for like three seconds. There is no gore what so ever in this game . how dare they put zombie in the title. I haven’t felt so let down sice I watched the never ending story (and god damn it I should still be watch that film…its not even my bed time!!!!). And what adds even more to the bullshit factor is reloading. Even while serving up brick to unsuspecting zombie heads you have to reaload. Excuse me, I think I might be retarded but how the fuck do you reload a brick? Did I miss a day in high school or something? I would have had more fun polishing flavor flav’s clocks then trying to beat this game.

http://games.arcadeinvader.com/2008/06/zombie-horde.html

Zombie Survival 9/10

Two words HELL YES. No wait three words HELL MOTHERFUCKING YES!!!!!!!!!11 I expected more of the zombie games to be like this one.Again this is a standard one screen game you can turn left and right. That is really all you need to do and just let the zombie carnage happen. I want to say as little as possible about this game it speaks for its self. In fact the fact that the game comes with a disclaimer just means that here comes and awesome Popsicle on a hot day of bullshit. Playing this game is here by mandatory for all who wish to survive the coming zombie cleansing. Why are still reading this? PLAY THIS GAME RIGHT THE FUCK NOW! CLICK BELOW.

http://games.arcadeinvader.com/2008/06/zombie-survival.html

Funky Disco Zombies 5/10

With a name like that how can you lose… I don’t know so i am going to have to contact the developers and ask them what brand of crack they were smoking when they made this turd. And might I suggest investing in two monkeys and possibly a giraffe. I think that the best part about this game is the name.

Nothing else even comes close. After my final life I thought gee I could have had a V8. At least then I would have had a bad taste in my mouth that I would have been able to get rid of. You spend more time vacuuming up never ending ghosts than you do fighting disco zombies. I don't know why but when I think about this game I got to an angry place, surprisingly enough filled with zombies, when I am able to take out my rage accurately.


Its so much that this game is bad its just that it has such an awesome name and maybe 15 years ago on an nes this would have been top shelf. But its 2008, people are cloning sheep, there is an inter connected web of computers or “Internet”. I mean holy shit the state is being run by a cybernetic assassin from the future.

This game just does not live up to the title. And not only that but hard…like bullshit hard. Some of the jumps are damn near impossible. After playing this game something inside me moved… and when I got out of the bathroom I realized that I had more fun in there with nature than I did playing this game. I would love to continue to tear into this game but there are these grapes in my fridge . and if I don’t eat them they are pretty much just going to sit there and frankly I just can’t let that happen. If you are at all interested the link to this game is as follows:
http://games.arcadeinvader.com/2008/06/funky-disco-zombies.html

DEANIMATOR 7/10

The name alone make this bad boy an instant classic. It claims to be based on a short story. Why you would base a flash game on a short story is beyond me… I guess they wanted street creed or something. The funny party about this game is that there is no plot what soever. So either that was the worst story ever written ( see the Eragon book series for an example of this) or the game has nothing at all to do with story. Either way I want to read it after ripping this fine example of flash code.

This is your standard flash game. One screen point and click simple elegant and to the point. You just some old dude standing out in the woods capping zombie fools left and right. And you randomly find weapons and ammo. But you do a a solid death in this game. A zombie rolls up and rips your head(spine attached) off and holds it over your quivering body. This game gets straight to the point and doesn’t fuck around with plot or movement. Just here come th zombies kill them as fast as can.

I would consider this game a definite at work game. You won’t exercise any personal growth while playing this game, in fact I think tha same amount of thought and effort that went into zombie assault was applied to this game. Why this game is by far a superior game? Well that is like asking “why does a sailor love his rum”. It’s the mystery of the deep. It could be the fact that it was based on a book or perhaps that it was not designed by two monkeys and a giraffe high on Mountain dew and skittles watching calvin and hobbs. I would like to take this moment and say that Mountain dew is the greatest soda ever made and all you haters out there need to find out what time it is. Check your watch casue its go time.
You can get this game at:
http://games.arcadeinvader.com/2008/06/deanimator.html